As mothers we get pressure from so many directions. It doesn’t matter whether it’s from an internal or external place – it affects so many of our decisions and choices.
We are constantly bombarded by images of motherhood, what a mother should and shouldn’t be, how we parent compared to others, etc. But, if you really pay attention you’ll see that the best and worst parts of motherhood don’t often make it to social media. So we’re comparing our lives to snap shots of another persons. Or we are comparing our values and standards to what someone “wants” the world to know.
We can be hard on ourselves. I wholeheartedly believe that mothers are an amazing group of overachievers! We want to be great moms, teach our kids everything and let them experience life, look good in our clothes, give our families the best of the best, and so much more – all at the same time!
Both new moms and moms with experience put various pressures on themselves to do more, be better, go farther – and it’s time to question, is this really right?We don’t have to succumb to what looks like perfect motherhood
We don’t have to succumb to what looks like perfect motherhood and continue putting pressure on ourselves. Not by the standards set by our friends and family, or mainstream media, or even the conscious parenting movement.
As much as I love to talk about parenting styles and how other moms are doing their thing, I don’t want to be just like them. I want to take what I’m learning and hearing and put my own spin on it.
I look at what expectations I have of myself and decide, is this going to match up? Does this really fit with who I am?
We can have ideas of what is expected of us – and then meet, change, or disregard those expectations.
Trina Small of Baby Shopaholic reminded me that when we try our best we’re really giving priority to what’s important at the moment. So something might fall to the wayside for a season and that’s fine.
She doesn’t put pressure on herself to be the perfect mom at all times, and in the end she becomes an amazing mom.
It seems that pressure kind of sneaks up on us and we don’t realize it’s affecting us until we have a frustrating moment and want to scream. So here’s some ways to lessen the pressure on yourself periodically so hopefully this happens fewer times.
- Don’t try to be the expert in all things
- Be yourself, even if that person is not the best in certain areas
- Spend time talking to women like you and women you like
- Give grace, forgiveness, and patience to yourself like you do others
- Don’t stop asking for help
Want some help finding women like you and women you like to go through this with? Join our Facebook group as we discuss the ups and downs and being a working mom.
[…] our idea of what a good mother looks like, and most of the time, we believe we’re far from it. We compare ourselves to what we see other women doing and think, “how is she doing all that and still able to…” – you fill in the blank. The […]
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